Not that I had ever gone anywhere, but I haven’t been making the time to write lately. Coulda. Shoulda. Woulda. But I didn’t. Although I am doing basically okay, I am starting to realize that I was feeling much better when I wrote down what was going on. And what I was thinking. This particular post is intended to be a public Note-To-Self: a list of some of the things I want to write about. As I fill in the blanks with further posts, I will come back and put a link to the new post. I figure a public note will prod me into writing. We’ll see if it works.

The How I’m feeling post

The reason I need to write regularly is that it does help me process what I’m thinking. And right now in addition to the natural grieving process, and missing Kathy, I seem to be feeling some low-level depression and anger. I wish I could say that the anger is directed at Donald Trump. I’m not angry that I had to take care of Kathy. Or that she isn’t here to keep me company. It’s the complete opposite. I would do it again in a heartbeat. I can say I enjoyed the daily problem solving and the unspoken gratitude I could feel from her. But, I seem to be dredging up the bad times we had as a couple during the early stages of Huntington’s. I’ve talked about this before. But, I keep on bringing it up in conversations. So.

The Kathy’s Art Exhibit post. Update the date.

The exhibit of Kathy’s art is scheduled for the month of September at the Wilbraham Public Library. A reception was originally scheduled for Sunday, September 18. Literally as soon as I published this blog post I received an email from the library. The said they might not have the funds to open on Sundays this year. So, I rescheduled it for the day before Saturday, September 17th. I have repaired many of the pieces and have readied them for hanging but there is still a lot to do.

The Fundraising post

Remembering Kathy Lehndorff on Generosity.com has met its original goal of $3000. And thanks to many of you, I was able to make a dent in my funeral home debt. I am leaving it open for now in case any new friends would like to help with the exhibit and publication costs. But honestly, I was getting a little sad visiting the page and the pictures. I just needed a break and I am sorry I haven’t been updating the donors. I also want to talk about another Huntington’s Disease Fundraiser I went to in Connecticut. They raised about $13,000 for UConn’s Huntington’s Disease Program.

I also want to talk about another HD fundraiser I went to in Connecticut, The Fred Maher Family Journey to cure HD. They raised over $13,000 for UConn’s Huntington’s Disease Program. There were over 160 tickets sold to the event.

Books about Huntington’s Disease post

I’m not a big book reader for some reason. But I wanted to read Inside the O’Brien’s, a novel about a family affected by Huntington’s by Lisa Genova. She is the author of Inside Alice. I went to go hear her speak at a local library just a few weeks after Kathy had passed away from Huntington’s. There were several Huntington’s families in the audience, so I didn’t feel alone. At that point, I had ordered the paperback version of it but it wasn’t out yet. I really didn’t finish reading it until I went to visit my sister, Barbara in Reno after her surgery.

Following that, I heard about another young adult novel. Rules for 50/50 Chances by Kate McGovern. And when I was arranging for Kathy’s show I asked the librarian if she had heard of it. She said, “I just bought it!” So, I had wanted to write a comparison of the two HD novels. I heard about another one The Shortest Way Home by Juliette Fay. So, I need to put down my thoughts about Huntington’s in pop culture if I can remember what I read.

A Music post or two

Music wise I’m having fun if nothing else. While I continue to go to open mics by myself and with my friend Charley Thompson, I have also had another somewhat paying gig with friends in South Hadley MA and have been working on my electronic press kit. That way I can send out inquiries about gigs and direct folks to a single source of info. Here is a link to it so far. I have one gig lined up in November at the Vanilla Bean in Connecticut, a club that Kathy and I went to many times. This Sunday I will be a finalist in an open mic showcase at the Towne Crier in Beacon NY. If you remember that was an open mic I performed at on what would have been Kathy and I’s 38th Anniversary. It was just a few months after she passed. I’ve since become friendly with Don Lowe, the songwriter who is the host there. At this event, there will be 17 acts. I was able to look up some of them on the internet. There will be bands, songwriters, at least one really good stand-up comedian.

The Huntington’s Waltz

I have been working on a new song called The Huntington’s Waltz. It is actually the first song I have ever written in 3/4 time. At my Huntington’s support group, I was saying how I wished I could advise people on where to get help or run a support group. Bonnie, the HD social worker at UConn said that things like that should be done by professionals because I wouldn’t be prepared for some of the things that m come up. She said that I could help more people through this blog. Or she said, “Maybe you should write a song about HD.” I dismissed that idea as way too hard for me. But it is pretty much ready. I’ll probably start by doing an informal YouTube video first. Stay tuned.

The Looking for Work post

Work has picked up a little bit. I still do most of my g for Butler Hospital. But I started to get some projects from Women & Infants Hospital, part of the same healthcare corporation in Rhode Island. My goal was to reach out to one new client and one new music venue each day. I haven’t kept it up but I did get one meeting where I brought my portfolio and it might be a source of work in the future.

The What are your plans? post

I have spent a good deal of time keeping the house from getting worse. I get lots of compliments on the front porch but it is time to start finishing up some things that have been neglected inside. I need to freshen up the upstairs before I can move the bed back. That means ripping out the old carpet and bubbling wallpaper. I haven’t been ready until now.

I also keep wondering about whether to even stay here or try to move into something smaller. I like this house. But the more house I have, the more crap I collect. And now I have the contents of the storage place (Kathy’s art etc.) here. so it is hard to think straight. I loved the idea of building or buying a tiny house or getting a small retro trailer to live in. I would be great to not have a mortgage but once you add the cost o land or a place to park it, it seems risky. I’ve thought about getting a roommate, too.

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I’m sure there will be other posts that will find a way onto these pages. But for now this is a list.