LIFE: We all know how “stuff happens”; or “life happens” and of course shit does indeed happen – to all of us.

“Luck Happens”

My guess is that most of us have some periods of good luck. Those are followed by bad luck. And it keeps repeating like biorhythms. How we respond to them determines what could happen next. That is how we evolve as people. We try to take advantage of things when they are going our way; and not give up when the shit hits the fan. At least that is my thought of the day.

Why I feel lucky.

I have mentioned a Yahoo support group that I belong to. It is for Huntington’s Disease caregivers. Although I have shared some of the “stuff” Kathy, and I have gone through, I feel bad for what others are going through. Obviously I can’t use names., but their stories are amazing.

One man got a call from the nursing home. His wife (or daughter) had a violent episode related to her Huntington’s. She attacked a nurse, hitting her and claimed that the nurse had taken her cell phone. She then pulled a fire alarm, which unlocked all the doors. She tried to run away. They took her to a hospital to get her meds evaluated, but the nursing home hinted they might not allow her to return. He was asking “if they can refuse to no longer care for a person?”….   Later he wrote that she was still in the ER at the hospital. The nursing home refused to take her back. The hospital told him he would have to come and take her home. He had to care for her at home, or they would place her in adult protective service. He would no longer have a say in her care….

The other members replied with encouragement and information. They do have to find another home and “they can’t force you to care for someone at home.” Others replied with horror stories of their own…   One woman is 81. I am assuming her husband has already passed away from HD. One of her daughters with HD was sent to the hospital from her nursing home for angry outbursts, and they wouldn’t let her return to the home. The hospital found a new home for her to stay and she finally calmed down for the last six years of her life. Her other daughter was “kicking and punching also” and was moved into three different nursing homes. It also seemed like the more the Mom visited her daughter the more it made her agitated and want to go home. So, she realized it was better not to visit her….  The moderator of the group told the story of how her husband (with HD) had tried to kill their son. She got him admitted to the hospital. She lied that he was having a stroke, so they would have to keep him. When they wanted to adjust his meds at home, she refused to take him back. With kids at home it would be unsafe. They did find a home where he lived for three years….   And there are other recent stories too. A woman whose husband is in a home 12 hours away, is being transferred to a psych hospital. They need to adjust his meds and they want her down there to help. She is disabled, has no income and is having trouble figuring out how to make the trip if at all. Meanwhile her 13-year-old son was just diagnosed with Juvenile Huntington’s.

So, really I can’t complain. Stuff has happened to us. It was tough, but we survived. I wish Kathy were not ill, but it could be much, much worse. I’m pretty lucky.